Thursday, December 02, 2010

we're crazies.

we let this go on for a looong time, but not too long...if we made it to an hour then i would say too long.

1:48 PM me: just finished your painting! i just have to spray it with a sealer tomorrow!
Julene: OMG!!!!!
when am i going to get it?
11:49 PM me: christmas morning of course!
11:50 PM Julene: WHAT!!! I don't get it before then.
wait. are you coming to my house christmas morning to give it to me?
11:51 PM Julene: OMG.
wait, are you santa clause?
11:53 PM me: noo nooo im mrs clause...santa is jachen
11:54 PM Julene: omg. is this is like the movie Santa Clause 2 where he has to get married in order to truly become santa?
11:55 PM me: noo. we just have to get married in the US we are already married in the north pole
Julene: omg. you are married and you didn't tell me?
11:56 PM me: well, i really shouldnt even told you i was mrs clause...i have had to keep that a secret from you for well since i have meet you
11:57 PM Julene: it's ok, i forgive you.
so can i come work as an elf?
i know i'm not technically an elf but i am pretty small and i do have very nimble fingers.
11:58 PM me: sorry, we only use technically elvers
yes we call them elvers there
11:59 PM Julene: hahahahaha.
then what about buddy the elf. he wasn't a real elf.
12:00 AM me: ya i know, he was just an actor in a movie. duh.
ps what is your middle name?
12:01 AM Julene: Laree
me: ya see all real elvers middle names are a christmas sorry..
Julene: bahahahahaha.
i seriously just laughed out loud.
12:02 AM me: wait, are you making fun of the elvers?
12:03 AM Julene: no of course not. i am an elf.
me: wait really?
but you said your middle name was laree
12:04 AM Julene: what you didn't know is that Laree means gingerbread in danish.
me: what is santas name in danish?
answer in 5
12:05 AM yup, like i thought. you dont know.
12:06 AM Julene: i don't know. i don't speak danish. my mom just told me what my middle name meant.
me: all danish elves are to know santas name in danish
Julene: i think i would have told you if i spoke danish.
12:07 AM me: its like a code to seperate the fake elves from the real elvers
Julene: i wasn't raised around other elves. and my parents aren't elves, so they didn't know.
12:08 AM me: ohh so you are a mugblood?
me: are you sure youre not an ewok?
12:10 AM sometimes ewoks get confused for elves
12:11 AM Julene: yes, i'm sure. i would be more hairy if i was an ewok.
me: well if that is the logic...where are you elf ears?
12:13 AM Julene: well my parents got the pointy part of my ears sergically removed when i was little because the other kids were making fun of me.
12:14 AM me: oh so you didnt stick up for the elvers? you just let them bash them and then you go and remove your pointy ears? disgrace
12:15 AM santa is going to hear about this.
12:16 AM Julene: i'm sorry. i was 2 years old, i didn't have much say in the matter.
12:17 AM me: elves earn their accountability at the age of 2! so therefore you were accountable! you did have a say in the matter! and still you lie to mrs clause and say you didnt...?
12:19 AM Julene: well i did say something, but i was too small to physically defend myself. i was too weak. it was the biggest mistake of my life.
i have nightmares about it every night.
12:20 AM every night i lie awake and instead of sugar plums dancing around in my head, i have elf ears with evil faces on them throwing spears at me.
12:21 AM me: well i have considered all the evidence. and it seems to me that you have worked hard proving your dedication to the elvers. i can see that you were truly effected by the choices of your muggle parents and you are strong now and have the heart to make a great elf.
12:22 AM Julene: omg. thank you. this means the world to me. you will not regret this.
12:23 AM this is the happiest day of my life.
12:25 AM me: but first we have to have a grand counsel to vote you in..since you have lost your point ears, you dont know santas name in danish which is Julemandan by the way. so we just have to take this up with the council of the elvers
12:26 AM Julene: ok. i hope for a good response.
12:27 AM i will wait eagerly with open ears and an open heart.
12:28 AM me: i will inform the council of this.
Julene: ok. thank you.
wait, how long have we been talking about elves?
12:29 AM i'm pretty sure it's been like an hour.
me: just about
Julene: bahahahahaha
me: since 1154
Julene: bahahahaha. omg.
me: I KNOW. who does that?!?
12:30 AM Julene: we do aparantly.


Jenn said...

In all honesty, I just read this entire post.. and for a second thought that I was reading a real childrens story about a little girl who was born an elf but was forced to conform to normalcy in the united states when all she really wants to do is make toys. *tear*....

p.s If Jachen is really Santa Claus, I need to talk to him STAT.

haha.. love you girls.

kaitlin said...

funny. i love gchat.

Julene said...

OMGOSH!!! just as funny the second time reading it. bahahaha. i'm am seriously laughing uncontrolably right now.

The Hulbert Family said...

Wow! That was very...interesting. Oh and one more thing to make Julene a legit elf: Julene in Danish technically could mean The Christmases. I mean if you stretch it a bit.